Thursday, May 6, 2010

its not that easy being 17

So much to say, I don’t even know where to start. No one understands the fact that even though I’m 17, I’m young I should be able to handle a lot, I can’t. All this drama and fighting between my parents and then the fact that it’s coming down to me, is getting to me. Then the fact that it’s getting to me, is affecting my school. I don’t even go to school anymore. I ditch so much, because I just can’t handle it .

My boyfriend and I decided to do good in school, together. He’s going through troubles too, and we decided that together we would be able to go through it. The day that we decided this, my mom decides she is going to put me in boot camp. The thing is, she talked to my school about this, only giving them one side to the story. The side where she’s the victim. My school wouldn’t even have it. They didn’t hear me at all. They didn’t listen to me. They don’t understand. It’s hard for me to concentrate when she’s yelling in my ear, hitting me, blaming me for all of the things that are going on . I’ve came to points in my life where I didn’t care anymore about anything about anyone, then I’ve came to points where I’ve tried to forgive, but that’s too hard, and then I’ve came to points where I wanted everything to end , where I turned to suicide. I really don’t even know what to do anymore. I shouldn’t have let this all affect me so much, but I did and now I’m in a position where I don’t know if I could fix what’s going on . smh (shaking my head)

1 comment:

  1. Lyssie, hang in there. Don't ditch classes - you will regret it later. You and your boyfriend made the right decision, support each other. If you have a trusted teacher or other adult you can talk to, do it.