Sunday, October 4, 2009

... and I ask myself .. How long can this happiness last? ... ( including a some quick rants. haha)

This weekend, was probably the happiest i've been in a long time.
Sounds so super girly/cheesy! and I hate sounding that way, but I have to when it concerns what I'm about to say. I have a boyfriend! ;D ... Finally, in almost a year or so, I have a boyfriend. This one, I chose wisely, and I waited, and I really really care about genuinely. I'm surprised, being the person that I am, I waited for so long just to hear him say, "Will you be my girl [friend]?" ... The intense amount of happiness I felt made me freakin' soar into the night sky last night when he said that. I knew it would happen, but for some reason, just the fact that it did made me soo happy. So much things in my life are going so wrong, but this one thing finally just happened for me, and it seems like, things might just get brighter. Of course, I'm not going to hope, because they probably won't, but for now, I'm just plain happy. I can't smile enough, I can't tell anyone enough, I can't stop showing off to my friends, but I don't care! because I deserve it! I deserve to finally say after so long, and after so many (you might think there wasn't a lot, but there definitely was) bullshit relationships, and after so many ass holes, I get to finally say, I have a boyfriend and he is AMAZING, he doesn't need the money, he doesn't need the title, he's amazing by just being him. That's the first time I was able to ever say that, and for the first time in a long time, I'm just sure now. A lot of people might say I'm stupid, but you know what, FORGET THEM! because I'm gonna enjoy this moment for as long as I have it, however little that time may be....

whoa wait .. that rant totally just included the "How long can this happiness last.." part .. but .. maybe I can salvage a few more words and continue on ...

Well, putting aside how happy I am, I still of course ask myself, "How long am I gonna be happy?" I've never felt this kind of "happy" before, but still, not everything lasts, so I fear when the crash will come. I'm honestly enjoying this part way to much for the time being and I don't want it to end. uuuugh .. I hate being skeptical about things sometimes, it is such a downer!

Thursday, October 1, 2009

"Your an unusual little asian girl.."

Story time haha.
I don't really like filling my blog with just sad little tidbits about the sad parts of my life, so I'm going to tell ya'll a daily story. (hopefully, i can make it daily, being a junior requires a lot homework, so I always try to fit in my blogging, and sometimes fail =/)


I'm a dancer haha . I think I mentioned this in my other post. Anyway, so I'm a dancer, and I've been trying to take a hip hop class for credit at my new school, but the dance teacher does not like me and won't allow me to. (BEING ME, IM NOT GOING TO TAKE HER CRAP AND I'M GOING TO KEEP PERSISTING ON GETTING THE CLASS I WANT. HAHA . THAT'S JUST THE WAY I AM.) I kept telling one of my friends, Reggie, if he can hook me up, so I can take a spot on one of the teams. He actually came some what through for me, and was telling me to just go to my counselor and ask for a transfer, but then the whole conversation led to, "Let's battle, girl! Ima call you out on the dance off!" lol. I didn't really take this seriously, so I just said alright and laughed.
Round noon, lunch came through, and me and my friend Janell decided to go through to the dance off and check out Reggie's moves. We were there and saw my girl, Mighty, and she dragged us to the front, which was chill, because we got to see all the action up close. Then things got hot, and Mighty and Reggie start pushing me into the circle and started hole circle up calling my name! All I heard was everyone chanting "Ly~sette! Ly~sette!..." .. My adrenaline pumped up and I was just like, should i dance or should i run? I don' t know these people so I had to contemplate what to do, but I decided to run! such a bad idea, now Tomorrow I'm determined to show off some sort of moves out there, haha .. even if I do embarass myself, because those are some amazing dancers in that circle and I'm kind of afraid I don't compare, but I want to try to hold up my end. ;D

haha.. I tried hard to make this story not very morbid .. hope I succeeded